On the crumb shortage

Your correspondent writes that reserves are "adequate." I have three children and a shelf with nothing on it. I invite the Ministry of Supply to visit my shelf and describe it as adequate to my face.

R. Tillow, Lower Sift

On the parliamentary floor

I have served in the Grand Chamber for nineteen years and I have never once fallen over. The suggestion that members are incapable of remaining on a bench is an insult to the profession. I remain, as ever, seated.

Hon. D. Krumm, Parliament

On roundness

Cordelia Vance argues that we should accept our shape. Easy for her to say. She is, by any measure, beautifully round. Some of us are ovals and have made our peace with it differently.

A. Fennimore, Eastcrumb

On the observatory

Nine years and four decimal places of nothing. I have achieved the same result at home and at considerably lower cost.

P. Marlowe, Mount Sift